


Hey! Wake up, it's Halloween... in a month

by Freelance_Magic



Series: Sam & Max Halloween Special [1]
Category: Sam & Max
Genre: M/M, Max really likes Halloween, Sam just wants to sleep, Slightly grumpy Sam, unbetaed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-26
Updated: 2019-09-26
Packaged: 2020-10-28 13:17:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20779217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Freelance_Magic/pseuds/Freelance_Magic
Summary: Max might be a little too excited for Halloween





	Hey! Wake up, it's Halloween... in a month

_ “And the prize for most long winded sentence and best ears in show goes to Sam of the Freelance police!” The announcer calls. I’m in shock. I won! I can hardly believe it! I rush to the stage like Max to a nazi’s scalp, which is to say very quickly and with a clear target. I walk to the podium and graciously accept the reward. The audience claps for me. “Thank you. Thank you so much! I would like to thank all the old dogs in the academy for presenting me with this. I would also like to thank my husband, Max. And kid Geek.” I thank. I glance to Geek and Max. Geek’s wearing some sort of space suit, did they get a job at NASA or something? And Max is wearing a very saucy black dress with red lipstick that would make any Dog policeman say “Hoochie-mama” faster than a bullet train stuck by lighting! _

_ The audience begins to chant. “Sam! Sam! Sam! Sam! Sam! Sam! Sam! Sam!” The audience chants. “Thank you.” I thank once more while waiting for the audience to calm down. But the audience grows louder, and louder. Then the audience becomes all Max. “Sam! Sam! Sam!” The Max’s chant. Listen, I love the little guy. But this is getting to be too much to handle. “Sam! Sam! Wake up, Sam!”  _

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

“Grughh...What time is it?” I mumble as I rub the sleep from my eyes. “Like, four in the morning.” Max answers as he stands proudly on my belly. “Max, love of my life, ice to my cream, why did you feel the need to wake me up at four in the morning?” I ask drowsily. “Because! It’s gonna be Halloween soon!” Max exclaims. “...Isn’t still september?” I ask. “Yee?” Max responds. I sigh. I love him. But right now, I’m tempted to strangle him. 

“What? Were you having a good dream?” Max asks. “In matter of fact I was. You were wearing a very sultry dress that made my mouth water and made my brain use the term “Hoochie-mama” in a thought.” I tell. Max face turns to one of disgust. “That’s gross. Never use that term again.” Max demands. “You aren’t in my good graces at the moment, hoochie-mama.” I growl as I cross my arms. 

“Ah hell yes. You’re sexy as hell when you’re a grump!” Max giggles. “Care to explain why you wanted to wake me up?” I groan. “Well, Sam. You see, I realized that Halloween was upon us soon. And I felt like you should know that.” Max points out. “Is that really it?” I mutter. “Yep. That’s the whole thing.” Max shrugs. “...Please don’t tell me you tried to tell Geek.” I sigh. Max looks away vaguely sheepish. “Well…” Max starts. “Oh lord give me strength.” I groan. “Heh. That’s guy/woman/whatever the hell is pretty stingy about freebies, Sam. You need to sacrifice something!” Max giggles. 

“...Like a small animal thing?” I ask. “Yep!” Max chrips. “...Something that perhaps just woke me up?” I ask. “...Sam… that is… the single most KINKYEST thing you have ever offered to do to me. You dog!” Max giggles. “Anyways… what did Geek do in response to your rudeness?’ I ask. “...They backhanded me with their pillow.” Max tells. “Good. Glad they know how to handle you.” I sigh. 

“...So… wanna set up the decorations?” Max asks. “No. It is sleep time, little buddy.” I point out as I roll over, knocking Max off his feet. “But Saaammm!” Max whines. “No buts, expect for yours in this bed until at least six thirty or later.” I say, laying down the law as I lay in bed. “Oh, yeah? How are you gonna stop me, Sammy boy?” Max challenges. I grab Max and pull him close, I then roll over so that I’m on top of him. “...You really think this can contain me?” Max asks. “Yes, now shh.” I sush as I cuddle into my annoying husband. “...I need to use the bathroom.” Max says. “I don’t care.” I mumble. “You will once I pee on you!” Max points out. “That’s a risk I’m willing to take.” I mumble. 

Please, Max. Just stop talking and sleep. “But-” Max starts. “Silence, Bottom.” I growl. “That’s rich coming from you.” Max snarks. “You can’t resist me, Max.” I tell. “Yeah, I know.” Max grumbles. “...Not to mention two nights ago when you were begging for me to-” “Ahem, keep the rating in mind, Sam.” Max interrupts. Oh, right. That “T” rating. “...Are we done here?” I ask. “...Fine. I’ll try again tomorrow.” Max sighs. 

I’ll take it. Future me is gonna curse me, I can feel it. I relax and snuggle closer to Max. “G’night, Sam.” Max yawns. “ ‘Night, little buddy.” I reply. “...Do you think we can do what we did two nights ago?” Max asks. “...Later.” I answer. “...Can you also call me mean names?” Max asks. “No, dumb ass.” I respond with a tired smirk. “...Tease.” Max grumbles. “You love it.” I whisper. 

At that moment a fire truck rooms by the house with it’s sirens blaring. I groan. “Maaax.” I whine. “It wasn’t me! I was here the whole time!” Max defends. “Really?” I ask. “...Well… I did leave the house… but I didn’t start any fires! All I did was walk to our neighbors seven houses down and put a jack o’ lantern on their front porch and- Oh my god.” Max trails off as he realises something. “Max, you didn’t.” I blurt. “...To be fair… it was an accident.” Max says sheepishly. “...Why do I put up with you?” I ask. “Because I’m sexy?” Max tries. 

“Oh right.” I nod. “Soooo…. How about some lovin’ near the fire, eh?” Max tries. “Nice attempt. But I’m gonna have to pass out on this one, little buddy.” I say as I re-close my eyes. “Well, night Max- I mean, Sam.” Max says. “Night.” I reply. 

And this time, I’m successful in my attempt to fall back asleep.

  
  


_ Max pats me on the head. “You make for one sexy werewolf, Sam.” Max giggles. “Ware means man, Max. I was always a werewolf by definition.” I tell him. _

My eyes fly open. “Max. Max. Max. Max.” I repeat as I shake Max awake. “Ugh! What?” Max asks. “Are you aware that I can be classified as a werewolf?” I ask. “...You aren’t a wolf. Your a dog. A weredog.” Max mumbles as he rolls over. “You knew?!” I ask. “Sam, go to sleep. I’m tired.” Max grumbles. I lay back down. 

...I never realized that.

**Author's Note:**

> TL;DR  
Firetruck: *Exists*  
Sam: Max, what did you burn down?”  
Max: Hey! I take offense to that. I’ll have you know that- oh, wait. I think I may have burnt down our neighbors… 
> 
> Spook time is almost upon us y’all!


End file.
